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Palliation, railiation, rail against the pain.
Is ability to feel nothing all I hope to gain?
Look back over horizon, remembering joy filled glee
Damn sine wave of living is set on drowning me.

Down there ‘mongst the flotsam, in the fetid deep
Only thing I was contemplating was how long till I am reaped?
There was no joy in Mudville, Mighty Casey had checked out
Could not arise from the grave, felt naught but pain and doubt

I was up, I fell down, and falling caused such dread
On rocks down at the bottom, nearly smashed my head
When sun was at its zenith, I witnessed more than night
Someone commanded, “Grab the rope! Climb up to the light!”

This rope that I was offered, had to set myself
Took effort of Hercules ascending shelf to shelf
Sisyphus stood by, smiling mockingly
Certain I would fail and fall back into despair’s sea

Higher that I climbed, more that I could see
Though I keep climbing, seems I still can’t get to me
My heart that once was joyful, and then filed with dread
Now it’s stuck in Limbo with existence far too dead

No longer imprisoned by pain that stomped and choked
And escaping from searing monster got me a little stoked
But wherefore art thou sunlight? Fair Juliet the dawn?
My life no longer misery but still long so for spring’s song

All that I can do is to keep on keeping on
Keep eyes set on Heaven as I crawl this marathon
Pony in there somewhere, is optimists’ refrain
Praying to again be joyful rather than just mostly free from pain

Damn sine wave of living is set on drowning me
Look back over horizon, remembering joy filled glee
Is ability to feel nothing all I hope to gain?
Palliation as a life style just fills me with disdain

 

Hospital bed with IV

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